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Issue 23 - Yuletide 1999/2000


CHEATING Worthing Borough Council has moved the goalposts in the Battle of Monster-gue Place. The arrogant bigwigs at the Town Hall could not care less what the people of Worthing want for the town centre and are going to plough on with their ugly business-orientated plans regardless. All this has become quite clear from their shameful reaction to the defeat last month of the plans to build shops over Montague Place. “People Power” won the day, as the Worthing Herald reported on its front page on November 18. An alliance including Worthing Anarchist Teapot, Friends of the Earth and The Pork-Bolter stopped this foul scheme in its tracks. Following a high-profile street protest and with more than 500 names on a petition, plus 50 individual letters from angry residents, one of two dodgy plans was hurriedly withdrawn and the other thrown out by an embarrassed council at its planning meeting on November 16. But campaigners’ cheers had hardly died down when council planning chair Valerie Sutton revealed the hidden truth. In a shocking letter to the Worthing Herald (November 25) she first dismissed out of hand the idea that People Power had been instrumental in kicking out the proposals. How stupid of the Herald to imagine that a body as important as the council would be swayed by the views of the common swine! Whined the smug Sutton: “The scheme was actually rejected because it would have been premature to approve any scheme on this site until the area’s future has been resolved through the Worthing Local Plan.” So it turns out that the hundreds of objections to the Monster-gue Place plot apparently count for nothing. It seems people should have been objecting to a small part of an enormous and little-publicised document in which the council itself has – on the sly – earmarked Montague Place for development! Talk about moving the goalposts! And the deadline for consultations? December 13, 1999! Basically the council is giving a two-fingered salute to everyone who objected to the Monster-gue Place plan. It will now ignore the views of the town’s people on this issue, even though it knows full well what they are. A quick look at the objections to the shops plans proves that it was not just those particular applications that people were opposing, but any development. They want Montague Place to remain an open space! The council and their business chums may not like it, but the people of Worthing have spoken and woe betide anyone who tries to ignore them!

A Clare-cut interest?

HERE’S a funny thing. Why did veteran Lib Dem councillor Bob Clare declare “an interest” in Neville Pressley’s application for Monster-gue Place and leave the meeting when it was discussed? All speculation gratefully received. Meanwhile, we might just write and ask him ourselves, and while we’re at it invite him to join our illustrious Register of Non-Masons, founded by Neville Pressley. Historians might like to note that Bob Clare featured in the very first issue of The Pork-Bolter in October 1997 when we noted his support for the proposed multiplex cinema at Durrington and the similarly outrageous plan for warehouse-type shops on the Broadwater site of Neville Pressley’s Northbrook College. We invited Mr Clare to write and tell us why he’d switched from opposing to supporting the latter scheme, but, strangely enough, he never did!

Big Brother’s fear of dissent

AN XMAS puzzle for all the family. Simply work out the connection between these three reports:
  1. The Cabinet has been told by its advisors that “the task of government will be made increasingly difficult by the emergence of an electorate that holds anti-materialistic values and distrusts law and authority” (The Observer Nov 21).
  2. The Tory council leader of East Sussex has warned that Government plans to increase the number of new homes could lead to “civil unrest and force people to become lawbreakers” (Evening Argus Nov 18).
  3. The new Prevention of Terrorism Act re-defines “terrorism” to include environmental activists (The Guardian Nov 15).
Got it yet?

Pigging a fight with the Fat Cats

THE PORK-BOLTER is an independent community newsletter for Worthing, making a pig-headed stand against Big Business and all the corrupt politicians who slither up the greasy pole into the stinking innards of its foul financial orifices (yuck, we’ve made ourselves feel quite sick). If you want to ensure you see a copy of issue 24, simply send us a stamped self-addressed envelope. To get the next six issues send a donation of at least £2 to cover costs. Copies of back issues are still available. Cheques/postal orders made payable to The Pork-Bolter. email subscriptions also available. Drop us a line: or PO Box 4144, Worthing, West Sussex, BN14 7NZ. website:


HATS off to those clever Worthing Borough Council officials who thought they’d save the sea wall at Splash Point from the microscopic erosion caused by skateboarders. They inserted metal knobs in the top of the wall to put an end to any free fun that might inadvertently have become available to youngsters in the borough. What a shame for these public-spirited bureaucrats that some miscreants came back at night and removed the intrusive knobs along with sizeable chunks of the wall itself! No connection here with the Worthing Herald’s shocking front page announcement on November 11 that Worthing council is incompetent . No, no, please say it isn’t true!
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WEST Sussex county councillors have awarded themselves increases of up to 177% in their fixed allowances. And every penny richly deserved. v v v MYSTIFIED motorists heading up the A24 north of Worthing may have wondered why a huge mound of earth has been piling up on the west side of the road opposite Old Barn Nurseries at Dial Post. We can reveal that the muck marks the spot where Francis Maude MP, Tory shadow chancellor, has his country residence. He evidently does not share his party’s love of more and more bigger and bigger roads and wants to be screened from traffic noise – and, no doubt, protected from the hordes of rioting “terrorists” protesting at home building over the countryside.
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THE new "fast-track" legal system is thwarting justice, warns the Independent Park Home Advisory Service (tel 01 732 359 655) following a court battle between a group of aggrieved pensioners and millionaire Barry Weir of mobile home site firm Regency Property Services of Angmering. After the judge refused to deal with all the details of the case under the new rules, senior consultant Colin Packman told The Pork-Bolter: "Justice cannot be measured by the second and the minute. Fast food offers no nutrition. Swift court appearances provide no justice."
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WE’VE done something a bit different this month, to commemorate the end of the 20th century. Overleaf you will find a SOUVENIR FACSIMILE COPY of an original Pork-Bolter from December 1899. And don’t miss next month’s issue. Between now and the next publication date in the New Year we intend to try out a pedal-powered Time Machine knocked up by one of our mates and bring back a copy of The Pork-Bolter from the year 2100! Goodbye to the 20th century - and good porkin’ riddance!
Goodbye to the 20th century - and good porkin' riddance